How to date an American man
Why do Filipino women love American men? Did you say mainly for the Green Card? Perhaps, but brown-skinned Filipino women tend to believe that fair-skinned men represent a superior kind of human being. You don’t agree with this theory? Write in and tell me that I don’t what the heck I am talking about. But seriously, I do notice that a person fair of face often gets the most looks, even if to my mind, many people of the brown-skin variety may be better looking and when you get to know them, even more interesting.
But anyway, we are talking here about fair American men. I got this description of Americans from an internet blog and I think it’s a great description: Americans are a warm, welcoming, wonderful people with similar family values and tastes in reality TV. Sounds very much like us Pinoys. And the babies a brown-skinned Pinay can make with a white-skinned American man? Aren’t they gonna be the cutest, the most adorable, and the most likely to make its way up in the world, inheriting the best of both worlds – the hardworking, sexy, gracious genes of the Pinay coupled with the smart, first world genes of the American man.
But how to get yourself an American man. For a start, you need to know what to do when dating an American man. Here are five things you need to know about American men.
- Beer: American men grow up on beer, from the first sips stolen from their father’s pint, to underage drinking on campus and now that he is a grown man – how to guzzle down lots of beer during happy hours, at the bowling alley, in front of the TV. American men love their beer. In time, you too could learn to love beer – and put up with his beer belly. Don’t make too much of a fuss about it: You want American man, you got to know and love beer. Who knows, you may even start drinking the stuff and in time, also grow your own little beer belly.
- Country music. This is a genre of music which was born in in US of A. Seldom heard elsewhere except in small-time pubs where Matthew and the Mandarins still play. For those who have been around for some time, Matthew, a Singaporean, was the greatest thing in country music this side west of Tennessee. But that’s a story for another time.
Guitars, harmonicas, accordions, banjos, they all contribute to this brand of music that tells of heartbreak, missing husbands and cheating wives. You can’t get more down-to-earth with American life than listening to Johnny Cash, Sheryl Crow and Patsy Cline. Even Dolly Parton. Yes, let’s also not forget Hank Williams. Who they? Better hurry up and bone up on country music, darlin’ if you wanna make tracks with your American sweetheart.
- Oprah Winfrey: Yes, she is the great shaper of American thinking. You can learn a helluva lot of American philosophy and literature and yes, American grit – just watching one episode of Oprah. You might even start believing what she says, like for example: The big secret in life is that there is no big secret. whatever your goal, you can get there if you’re willing to work. and The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams.
See what I mean: If you can start practising what Oprah preaches, you will impress your American friend so much, he would want to believe that, indeed, you too know the American dream – and will want to walk down that road of life with him, starting with that vital walk up the aisle with you. You are my gal, Oprah.
- Hamburgers: Although Americans have great belief in healthy food, most will forgo all that at the sight and smell of of a juicy, scrumptious, king-size burger, double cheese and two slabs of cholesterol-laden processed meat. So, on your first date with your potential American man for life, choose McDonalds or Wendy’s or Burger King, when he asks you where you would like to eat. Later on, when you get to know him (and his income) better, you can progress up to steak joints. Think Mortens, Astons, The Black Angus when you are confident that he won’t think you unladylike when he views you tucking into a 200 gm portion of medium rare tenderloin and washing it down with generous gulps of beer.
Who knows, he might find the sight so sensual that soon, you could both be dining on prime cut in Peter Luger Steak House on Broadway in The Big Apple. Everything is possible, my dear. But first, start with the humble hamburger.
- Last but not least, be yourself. Filipino women have natural qualities that are attractive to an American man. You already sound like him, although the Americanised sounds coming from some Filipina lips in Angeles City can sound contrived, and jarring. Try cultivating a form of British-American spoken English. A combination of say, Hugh Grant, Simon Cowell, Oprah Winfrey (that woman is a gem for all kinds of things) and a bit of Kris Aquino, on the side. Could be very captivating. If his eyes light up at the sound of your voice, you are on to a good thing. But don’t overdo things. Switch to silent, sultry mode if his eyes start glazing over as you go blah,blah, blah. Believe you me darlin’, it’s not the beer that making him sleepy.
I chanced upon your magazine on my way home from work. Therefore, I decided to follow the calling of my Prime Minister, on integration among the locals and the new people. However, I was horrified to discover the culture of the Pinoys. Based on your article “Are Filipino men that BAD?”, this is what I have gathered;
- Shameless. I quote, “Oh dear, oh dear, are Filipino men that bad? Sure, we all know that Filipino men, with their Latin blood – believe they must appear tough…” According to my knowledge, Filipinos are Austronesians. Which is also the majority of Indonesians, Malaysians, Bruneians etc etc. I know the Philippines were colonised by Spain, but surely that does not make ALL Filipino men “Latin”? And isn’t Spain in Europe?
- Further down the same article, the writer mentioned young Filipino escorts with much older Filipino women. Making their clients feel like they’re the most desirable is what escorts are paid to do. Does the writer find pride in something that is considered cheap? Being an escort shows the lack of moral & values in one’s self through the eyes of society and also your God, Jesus.
- Referring to September 2010′s front cover, “How to date an American”. Why American? Why don’t you write something about “How to appreciate good men”? Are the Asian men not good enough, or are the Filipino women not good enough for Asian men?
So based on your column, I reckon should any other Singaporeans read this, we would be disturbed by the culture you are bringing in to Singapore. Our women are hardworking and we make sure we do not live inside the wallet of an American man. I hope future articles feature more intelligent content for the benefit of the society you are living in.